Another blonde in Sweden

Great news...I just found out today that my 2-year residence permit has been approved.  I'm moving to Sweden for real!  The entire application process took exactly 1 month and 20 days and was much less painful than I expected.  I had been prepared for the worst, as the Swedish migration board's website claims the application processing time takes anywhere from 6-8 months. 

So, I'll be heading back to the island of Värmdö with M in mid-April, just in time for spring!  I'll post more photos of my new home-to-be when I get back to dry land and fast internet, but in the meantime:

Learning Swedish, part one of many

I've been studying Swedish on my own for awhile now, and luckily it's a good way to put a damper on the antsy impatience of waiting for my residence permit to be approved while floating around at sea for five weeks.  So far the easiest part has been reading Swedish, while pronouncing it is a whole different story...with the addition of the letters Å, Ä, and Ö, the Swedish alphabet has more vowel sounds than I can keep track of.

One of the best ways for me to learn new vocabulary has been to break down each word into smaller chunks that are easier to memorize.  Some of the word combinations I've come across are very practical and downright adorable. Here are my favorites so far:

• Sköldpadda:  Sköld is shield, and padda is toad.  A shield-toad is a turtle.
• Jordgubbe:  This is a weird one...jord is earth/soil and gubbe is a little old man.  So essentially a dirty little old man is a strawberry.
• Ormbunke: Orm is snake and bunke is bowl.  A snake-bowl is a fern.
• Tvättbjörn:  Tvätt means wash/laundry, and björn is bear.  A laundry-bear is a raccoon.
• Blixtlås:  Blixt is lightning or flash.  Lås is a lock.  A flash-lock is a zipper.
  
•  Noshörning: See if you can figure this one out...yep, a nose-horn is a rhinocerous.
•  Havstulpan: Hav is sea, and tulpan is tulip.  A sea tulip is a barnacle.

Allt om Sverige

Last fall these lovely young Swedish ladies and I made this video.  Starring M's best friend's stepdaughter Sara and daughter Anna...Sara had a lot of fun translating the subtitles for me:

Squirrels on a boat

Living and working on a boat for five weeks straight sounds like a grand adventure full of danger and excitement....to the people who have never done it before.  Okay, so flying in a helicopter to get to your job is pretty cool.  Beyond that, the main challenges of living and working on a boat and staring at the water every day don't go too far beyond the mental battle between french fries or salad for dinner.  Rough seas?  Meh, a minor inconvenience when you're trying to take a shower or eat a bowl of soup.  Pirates?  Thankfully not a problem (to my knowledge) in the Gulf of Mexico.  Capsizing?  The boat I'm on at the moment is 81 meters long by 18 meters wide, so it'd take a leeeeeeetle more than your typical winter weather to tip this bucket over.  Fires?  Food shortages?  Scurvy?  Nope, nope, and nope.  There is safety equipment everywhere you turn and more than enough food to go around.  The crews on seismic vessels typically sleep in cozy, carpeted cabins in a temperature-controlled environment amid wireless internet, satellite TV, movie theaters, gyms, saunas, and sometimes even swimming pools.  No my friends, the most dangerous, terrifying phenomena I have experienced in my 1.5 years working offshore are (cue scary music):

SQUIRRELS.

Yes, you heard me right, I said squirrels.  

Let me explain.  A few years ago, my friend's brother said, "A woman's brain is like a squirrel trapped in a cage with its tail caught on fire."  I couldn't agree more.  I find this analogy oddly comforting...when I catch myself getting overly worried or upset about something silly, I just blame it on the squirrel.  It's a good way to explain the touch of psycho over-analyzing that all of us women do, whether we're willing to admit it or not.  So, if you're reading this and getting worked up and offended, guess what...IT'S ONLY YOUR SQUIRREL.  See, doesn't that feel better?

Unfortunately, once you're stuck in the middle of the sea with nothing around for miles but water and more water, recognizing and effectively controlling a rogue squirrel attack is next to impossible.  If there's something nagging in the back of your mind while you're on land, it will get ten times worse when your only plan for the day is to stare at the horizon while your squirrel chatters and rattles the bars of its cage, overthinking, overanalyzing, and occasionally freaking out completely.  Perfectly normal emails from loved ones seem confusingly sinister.  Sarcastic comments from coworkers get twisted into personal attacks that make you want to crawl back into bed for the rest of the day.  Once the evil squirrel has gotten his pointy little claws into your brain, no thought is safe.

Don't get me wrong, I am typically a calm, happy-go-lucky person, and I can't remotely pretend that living on a well-equipped boat full of interesting people is anywhere near the mental toll of something like solo sailing around the world.  Some of the people I know have spent entire YEARS at sea.  But, the occasional squirrel attack on board, when you really start to question if the thoughts in your head are even your own to begin with, is by far the hardest thing I've had to deal with out here.

Luckily I've gotten better at recognizing a fired-up squirrel and keeping it somewhat tamed with cheesy heartwarming movies (Love Actually is a good one).  But, until next time....